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Forget again! Those are my secret bathrooms that there are never a line at! We must not spread word of their existence.

Yes, honestly, please forget. As a one-hundred-and-billion-percent introvert I am physically unable to pee if I feel like there's too much going on in the bathroom and these have saved me many a-time.
 
Ah I'm that asshole who preys on people like you @Merboy . I apologise.

My favorite move is to set up next to someone at a urinal and to say "ooo that water is cold" just to really make the person next to me confused.

Yes I'm immature I'm aware
 
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Brethren, you have only confirmed your kindredness to me. I, too, am batshit crazy. Sometimes I go into the restroom with one of my partners and discreetly say things like "Was it at the point of smelling or did you get it buried in time?" after we come out of the stalls and are washing our hands.

But for true, I cannot pee if someone is sitting next to me. And if ever one of them says "ooo that water is cold"...... I will know..... I will know.....
 
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I just realized my last comment about "at the point of smelling or did you get it buried in time" in the context of coming out of a stall may have come off slightly more vulgar than I meant. To clarify I was insinuating there was a dead body.

Ah, moments I can't get back... places this one in my scrapbook
 
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