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Getting aHEAD of myself
Advisory Panel
Feb 12, 2011
With some news of some area of the park getting some changes made to it, I realized the direction the park is heading. And it goes without saying who the ringleader of all this is. What somebody in the Banbury Cross retheme thread said made perfect sense to me: maybe Scott doesn't like the park, and he's slowly trying to revert the park to his ideal image. So I figured, to hopefully make some light out of a weirdly "dark" situation, I would make a concept based on what he might be planning to do. So, without further ado, I give you the concept for Gasparich World, formerly Busch Gardens. Remember, this isn't what I want to happen. This is just a really exaggerated version of what could happen. Following is a hamlet-by-hamlet update on what will become of each area.

Beatles Bay (Formerly London, formerly Banbury Cross)
Well, it looks like the park is already doing the work for me on this one. Ha! However, London will eventually be given the ridiculous name Beatles Bay to better fit the "theme" of British-Invasion era London. Moving on.

Harry the Horse's Saloon (Formerly Heatherdowns)
Once Loch Ness Monster is removed without any warning (may or may not be Entertainment's fault), Entertainment will follow their tradition of working on whatever they can (a suddenly closed airline simulator and a haunted maze come to mind), what was once a sleepy Scottish village will take on a Wild West theme, starring everyone's favorite cartoon/costumed Clydesdale character who will roam the area thanks to the park's love of street actors, Harry the Horse! Harry will tie in to the famous Highland Stables, which has been renamed Highland Saloon and the Clydesdales will be replaced by animatronic Western animals. Entertainment will get to take over all theming in the park, including those of the rides, so we will see Li'l Clydes being renamed Li'l Cowboys. What used to be the Loch Ness Monster extended queue will become a theater for Klydesdale Kommotion where dance-happy cowboys gallop up, down, and around the construction of the Saloon Water Tower with their costumed horse pals, but since nobody likes authentic western music--not to worry--today's pop hits will simply be played with air fiddles. Yee-haw!

Papa Tony's Pizzeria (Formerly San Marco)
Similar to Mix It Up's theme in Il Teatro Di San Marco, all of Italy will turn into an old-fashioned pizzeria theme. The beautiful Italian statues will be replaced by giant menu billboards and statues of cartoony Italian pizza makers. The Flying Machine will be renamed The Pizza Spinner, with a façade of Papa Tony the pizza man (who apparently has three arms) spinning the rider consoles, dressed up to look like little pizzas. Like I said, the crazy theming going on with Entertainment takes over all other departments as well. Da Vinci's Cradle will be renamed Delivery Dilemma! (notice the exclamation point), with the vehicle made to look like a pizza delivery vehicle. Ride ops will thankfully not have to wear those silly bowling shirts--ride ops here will be dressed as pizza guys. Finally, Battering Ram will become Tip Jar Dip, themed to dipping down into the pizza man's tip jar! The station will be decorated with large pieces of fiberglass dollar bills as if riders are really diving toward the money--which is ironic and symbolic, because it's the exact opposite of what the park is doing! In the middle of the boat will be a statue of Papa Tony the pizza man, angry that the theme of the ride is grabbing from his tip jar.

Il Teatro Di San Marco will take on the theme from Mix It Up's 2011 stage, but in a much more exaggerated form. This will help tie in to the theater's renaming to Pizzeria Theateria! with the show Ring It Up!, which takes us behind the scenes of what it's like to be a pizza guy in today's crazy times...which really just tells us what it's like to be a theme park in today's crazy time. Additionally, the adjacent restaurant will turn into Senor Antonio's Pizza (Scott obviously never does his research...who care's if that's really Spanish, not Italian?)...after all, culinary department has been taken over, too...sort of like what happens with Entwined and the Festhaus. That's enough here. Go Papa Tony!

Party Sicily (Formerly Festa Italia)
This area is nearly perfect already. All Scott needs to do is spray paint all the tents with glitter and it's perfect for the "new" area! Need I say more?

Scott's Entwined Adventure (Formerly Oktoberfest)
The flagship of Gasparich World takes everybody's all-time favorite show, Entwined, and lets guest experience the loveable fairy tale world of Scott Gasparich! Attractions include Hansel and Gretel's Sunday Drive, formerly Verbolten, with the cars blasted with glitter and new license plates (GLITT R, COOL PPL, B GRIMM, 3BEARS, and ONLY17). Fiberglass characters from the show will greet riders throughout the queue and the outdoor portions of the ride, and the preshow is centered around Hansel and Gretel's Sunday Drive getting interrupted by a girl named Luna who wants to go where the cool people are. The inside portion of the ride's tree facades will also be sprayed with glitter to really SPARKLE, and "Dancing Queen" plays within the building. When the train approaches the drop track, the glittery castle flashes before riders drop...representing their spirits after seeing the show. Once trains make it to the broken bridge, a poster of the witch and psycho wolf can be seen draped on the roof, with one of the bridge's support beams disguised as the giant. Once the trains make it back to the station, Luna greets guests by saying, "You've made it to where the cool people are!" even though it's the same place as where they started, and Hansel and Gretel thank guests for riding before they are blasted with bread crumb confetti and their restraints unlock.

Beanstalk Jacque's Skydive: The Plummet of Quality! (formerly Mach Tower) will "improve" the ride that the silly rides department just couldn't get right when they had it. Beanstalk Jacque's Skydive (BS for short!) will be repainted a lime green--suck it up, Kingsmill! You've probably inhaled enough glitter already!--with the carriage made to look like vines, complete with the catch car made to look like Jacque climbing the beanstalk! The top of the tower will look like a castle that shoots glitter whenever the ride breaks down. Lucky for the glitter-loving Scott, that thing might be used quite a bit.

Other attractions include Red Riding Run, formerly Der Autobahn and Bread Crumb Boom-Boom, formerly Der Autobahn Junior, which have minimal changes except for all red cars and a cheap computer designed mural, complete with wrinkles from applying the printout of the mural, depicting Red Riding Hood riding in a jalopy, pursued by the Psycho Wolf. Plus, since people are apparently too dumb to understand warnings, the bumper cars will be attached to pre-determined guide rail like Le Mans had, and they will move at about 1/4 the speed of what they go now so nobody gets hurt...physically, that is. Psychologically, not so much. Curse of Darkastle's ride will not change except for an edit in the preshow audio referring to the villain as Count Vlad instead of Ludwig. The wolves in the queue will be replaced by sparkly psycho wolves as well. Fiberglass characters from Entwined and lots of glitter can be found all over the area.

Candy Landing (Formerly Rhinefeld)
This area takes the old German cobblestone pathways and gaily colored windows and turns it into the Lollipop Land of Busch Gardens Gasparich Gardens. The cobblestone paths will be repainted pink and yellow without any true pattern. Music like "The Candy Man" and "Lollipop Guild" plays throughout the area. The Wilkommenhaus, renamed Ice Cream Island, will be painted pink in permanent paint. Blasts of pink, red, and white confetti come onto the streets periodically. All of the shops will sell pre-packaged name brand mass-produced candy and cheap Gasparich Gardens souvenirs. Alpengeist will become High Fructose Corn Syrup Sidewinder (easy enough to remember, right?!) and will be painted pink with oversized pieces of candy throughout the queue, and the skis currently on the trains will have decals made to make them sort of look like different candy bars. The statue over the fountain in front of the Wilkomenhaus will be replaced with a giant glittery lollipop. The pieces of the clock will be replaced with big's not like that's not what they've been reduced to already.

Banjo Bayou (Formerly New France)
Sounds like a sort of quality theme, right? Wrong! Sure, New France didn't fit much either, but this new area features today's country hits played throughout (which really doesn't make a lot of sense in what will be a sort of New Orleans-themed area), and all references directly related to New France will be removed. Plastic boats and singing rubber gators will be placed around the area, with random bubble machines in random spaces of the area, along with a huge banjo-shaped play structure for kids to crawl around in in the old Eagle's Nest area, eliminating that part of what was once known as Le Scoot of its trees.

Krocodile Kommotion River Adventure, once Le Scoot, will take visitors to visit Kooky the Crazy Croc's den (even though crocodiles don't live in Louisiana bayous...think gators.) through the rivers of the area. The ride culminates with visiting what was once the saw mill, which is now shaped into a fiberglass boulder, with a dancing, singing animatronic cartoony gator suspended just before the logs take the plunge to the waters below. The Canadian Palladium will return, but due to budget cuts, Scott and his team will not be able to afford to remove Le Catapult from its space, so the performers will just perform while standing on the ride's vehicles/cars, which have each been designed to look like a different set piece for whatever show they perform. For the grand finale of the show, the ride will start and the cast members will fly in all directions! This is good, since Scott is always looking for ways to switch to new performers.

Le Deejaeiy Escargot (Formerly Aquitaine)
Banking off the
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